I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
