nut hugger
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
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