But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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