it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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