You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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