I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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