I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
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There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
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If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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