He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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