the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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