dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
