i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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