if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize