I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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