I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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