I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
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