So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
