Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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