Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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