Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(949): View more from California

Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?

Fav 21 3276 1100
share tweet
(310): View more from California

you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.

Fav 6 3688 814
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(763): View more from Minnesota

My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.

Fav 13 915 5728
share tweet
(202): View more from Washington, DC

i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day

Fav 18 6706 802
share tweet
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Read it at the TFLN blog
(330): View more from Ohio

i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love

Fav 26 6699 914
share tweet
(716): View more from New York

Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera

Fav 10 3117 1445
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(605): View more from South Dakota

I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.

Fav 7 3356 1174
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(727): View more from Florida

I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.

Fav 5 1793 681
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(415): View more from California

I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong

Fav 3 44 88
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT