Texts From Last Night

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  (916): View more from California

  does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.

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  (916): does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind. http://tfl.nu/4b1q
  Replies (3) Good night (3267) Bad night (577)
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  (905): View more from Toronto

  so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.

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  (905): so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever. http://tfl.nu/wzae
  Replies (126) Good night (23469) Bad night (1871)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  He kissed a someone with a penis

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  (912): He kissed a someone with a penis http://tfl.nu/3ilh
  Replies (14) Good night (1177) Bad night (3323)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM

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  (330): mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM http://tfl.nu/ia9w
  Replies (27) Good night (8647) Bad night (877)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.

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  (469): Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me. http://tfl.nu/jccz
  Replies (26) Good night (1022) Bad night (4063)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.

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  (937): I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens. http://tfl.nu/zmnj
  Replies (18) Good night (6773) Bad night (1240)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.

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  (434): i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister. http://tfl.nu/d8xo
  Replies (34) Good night (3652) Bad night (3199)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.

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  (479): I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober. http://tfl.nu/132v
  Replies (4) Good night (1583) Bad night (700)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.

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  (615): You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all. http://tfl.nu/of60
  Replies (4) Good night (1203) Bad night (579)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."

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  (239): Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..." http://tfl.nu/k8r7
  Replies (15) Good night (849) Bad night (2414)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."

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  (541): Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub." http://tfl.nu/xtt2
  Replies (15) Good night (1947) Bad night (819)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room

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  (715): And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room http://tfl.nu/oply
  Replies (5) Good night (881) Bad night (421)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there

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  (732): he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there http://tfl.nu/19cw
  Replies (3) Good night (305) Bad night (785)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.

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  (250): Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear. http://tfl.nu/ufbe
  Replies (1) Good night (664) Bad night (356)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick

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  (812): This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick http://tfl.nu/hypd
  Replies (1) Good night (305) Bad night (544)

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