Plan B is the new Plan A
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles