is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Randomize
