Texts From Last Night

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  (817): View more from Texas

  Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?

  (1-817): View more from Texas

  You weighed it?

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  (817): Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car? (1-817): You weighed it? http://tfl.nu/lai6
  Replies (37) Good night (22035) Bad night (1436) Order T-Shirt
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa

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  (989): I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa http://tfl.nu/0rxp
  Replies (27) Good night (482) Bad night (3325) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.

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  (919): My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq. http://tfl.nu/vzq9
  Replies (6) Good night (3520) Bad night (563) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.

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  (406): That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays. http://tfl.nu/wjf7
  Replies (25) Good night (4761) Bad night (806) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Strong 6

  (516): View more from New York

  That's an oxymoron.

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  (516): On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck? (201): Strong 6 (516): That's an oxymoron. http://tfl.nu/n45n
  Replies (32) Good night (1232) Bad night (4234)
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.

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  (262): I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter. http://tfl.nu/r6gs
  Replies (24) Good night (4067) Bad night (609) Order T-Shirt
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed

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  (208): My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed http://tfl.nu/lwb6
  Replies (11) Good night (2050) Bad night (1275) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment

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  (201): There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment http://tfl.nu/jnnd
  Replies (2) Good night (529) Bad night (1335) Order T-Shirt
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  (626): View more from California

  I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.

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  (626): I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there. http://tfl.nu/iwr8
  Replies (3) Good night (1535) Bad night (516) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone

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  (804): I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone http://tfl.nu/9ph0
  Replies (11) Good night (2746) Bad night (456) Order T-Shirt
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  (941): View more from Florida

  You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.

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  (941): You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard. http://tfl.nu/vxrl
  Replies (6) Good night (571) Bad night (1135) Order T-Shirt
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  I think a kid would responsible me up

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  (906): I think a kid would responsible me up http://tfl.nu/vbco
  Replies (16) Good night (427) Bad night (1796) Order T-Shirt
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south

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  (205): I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south http://tfl.nu/kpax
  Replies (7) Good night (1482) Bad night (448) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.

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  (917): i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle. http://tfl.nu/wmdi
  Replies (11) Good night (846) Bad night (254) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.

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  (603): Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon. http://tfl.nu/3aco
  Replies (3) Good night (377) Bad night (1014) Order T-Shirt

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