I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
