the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
