3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
