At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Randomize
