i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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