you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
