He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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