Heybabeimwearingurpanties
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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