Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
