Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Randomize
