This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
