You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
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