She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
