I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
