Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
