Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
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