I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
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