wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize