those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
