I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
