Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
