she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize