I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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