I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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