So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
