Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
