I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
