their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I am midnight drunk by noon
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
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