I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?