i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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